Love versus Fixing

Honoring is Loving!

A friend said to me years ago, “You can’t want for others what they do not want for themselves.”  I would say that over and over to myself, teach it to others, grapple with it in the quiet of my heart…and yet still desire, sometimes laboriously in pain for others to see truth, get truth, and/or desire change.  It was (and still is at times) difficult for me to understand, if there is a solution in sight, a direction, help, or assistance available, why someone wouldn’t choose it.  The minute I write those words, I know in different areas of my life that people could say the same about me…

I think in there, in my last sentence, lies some truth.  There always is going to be an answer, many answers (as well as opinions)…but the truth is our journeys are our journeys…and theirs are theirs.  My path is my path, our Spirit is the same Spirit…but that doesn’t mean my path is their path.  I do think as we learn and grow, as we trust and understand, we are going to understand more and more the needs, the pains around us, but as knowing grows so grace needs to as well.  We are used to gaining head knowledge (intellect) and teaching or sharing it…but as we gain and grow in our intuitions (grace, knowing, connectedness with the Holy Spirit), that sharing is not imposing, but understanding; not trying to fix or change; but letting others be on their path – supporting, upholding, loving, and moving in when invited…and ultimately respecting that they may never want for themselves what you want for you…and that is ok…because their journey is their journey…I think that is what true love is…loving others and allowing them to be on their journey…


2 Replies to “Love versus Fixing”

  1. I don’t think we can ever hear this message “too many times.” We need the gentle reminders because it is so easy to get back on the trail of “wanting something for someone he doesn’t want for himself,” at least not at the time that you want it for him. I appreciate your sharing your thoughts on this topic. I think I might print this one so I can read it weekly as I grow in grace.

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