Honor yourself this holiday season! Oh, that doesn’t sound like a giving holiday message, now does it? You may be saying, I should be writing about focusing on the reason for the season. I should be writing about the message of Christ’s birth, or Hanukkah, or giving, or serving…and I am telling you to honor yourself this holiday season.
Yes, listen to what I have been hearing in the last few weeks: “I don’t know how I am going to fit everything in, I have so much to do.” “I am trying to find the perfect gift, and I can’t find it, I have been on the computer for hours searching.” “I have to go to this party, and I don’t want to.” “Every year I am expected to have a dinner for these people, and it is so much work.” I don’t hear the Christmas message in these statements, do you? The reason for the season is foremost, but if our focus is on the above, then the message gets lost in the frenzy anyway.
Let’s think about this a step further. These “I statements” above turn into impossible expectations for self, and you (and I) know that when we have impossible demands on ourselves…we then either get really ugly, and/or we make impossible demands on those around us (those people who are safe to get our “stuff” – spouses, kids, parents, close friends…or the checkout clerk, the sales person, the person in the other car). Pretty much when we feel doomed, others are either going to know it or feel doomed themselves. Are you hearing the holiday message?
Here is the truth which you already know (but may have forgotten [smile]): marketing, media, peer pressure, family traditions, keeping up with the Joneses, trying to impress the in-laws, fitting in, wanting to be the more impressive parent, guilt offerings, expectations – none of these things are about Christmas, Hanukkah, or any of the other celebrated gatherings. None! Yet these are the very things that put us into a frenzy. These are the very things that cause us to overflow our “stuff” on others. These are the issues that cause more depression, fights, family quarrels – negativity. These are the things that end up governing the season. Let me say it bluntly and with no disregard for the true meanings of the season, Christmas is “another day” – every day during this season is just another day – keep it in perspective.
One of the greatest gifts you could give those around you is your own self honor. You don’t have to jump through hoops to do traditions because it is expected of you. Show those around you a new tradition – self care, self honor. Demonstrate the honor of the season as you meditate, pray, rest, stay focused on the true meanings. Demonstrate your own honor with boundaries, rest, baths, showing up when you are able to be present, not because you have to. Others will know more of the reason for the season if your honoring of you is a part of it.
One last thought – people love you and care about you because you are you, not because you have given them the perfect gift. The Perfect Gift has already been given. Give others your self honor, your peace, and your pleasantries because they overflow naturally…along with the truths of the season…these are the greatest gifts. Make this season all about holiday honor…and that honor is towards you.