Flash Friday Fictioneers

30 03 2012

I didn’t take the time this week to share any ponderings or integrative thoughts, but I had so much fun last week with writing for the Flash Friday Fictioneers that I decided to write a piece of fiction for this photo.  So if you are following my blog with my integrative thinking, stay tuned, and if you want to read a little fiction that I wrote this week, please enjoy.

A crusty marshmallow!  That’s what he was.  Look at his property.  “A man’s heart is known by his possessions,” those were his words, not mine.

He was a man of few words – really few anything.  He used to scare the daylights out of me.  One day when I was a kid, my brother dared me to climb on “the old man’s” tractor. (He was really Grandpa Joe to us, but everyone, including us called him Old Man.) 

So, yeah, he caught me on his tractor.  I was about seven, I think.  I heard this shrieking whistle.  I looked up and there stood the Old Man, cigar in mouth, leaning up against the fence post.  I knew that flick of his head. Time couldn’t go slow enough. I climbed down and began that torturous trek to meet him.  He never moved, except to take that periodic puff.  Not sure why I was so damn scared. I got to him and looked up.  He gave me that look, shook his head a time or two, and pushed me aside with that final dismissing brush of his jaw-never a word said, but I knew.

The Old Man’s gone now.   I’m left with his possessions.  Somehow it is ok, ’cause I got a piece of that crusty marshmallow’s heart.

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43 responses

30 03 2012
parul

An interesting love hate tale.. For done strange reason, reminded me of ‘To Kill a Mocking Bird’.

Here’s my attempt for the week- http://wp.me/p2u5W-81

30 03 2012
Kris Kennedy

I haven’t read “To Kill A Mockingbird” in a very, very long time…I will have to again…thanks for stopping by

30 03 2012
parul

For some strange reason*
Sorry about the typo… Commenting from the cell phone is always risky!

30 03 2012
Kris Kennedy

no problem

30 03 2012
zuzu70

Love it!!

30 03 2012
Kris Kennedy

you need to get involved…we need to catch up…

30 03 2012
Tom Poet

I like it but that’s more than a 100 words, you crusty old marshmallow!

30 03 2012
Kris Kennedy

I know…I noticed that too…I was so excited that, by accident I finished last weeks fiction at exactly 100 words…I will work hard to get back to that…thanks for stopping by

30 03 2012
Joe Lerner

Is this an actual memory or fiction? Only ask because it is so realistic. Want to read more. Thanks for sharing!

30 03 2012
Kris Kennedy

Totally fiction…didn’t have a grandfather…nor a truck…smile…thanks for stopping by

30 03 2012
Jeannie

good story Kris! Who cares if you went over 100 words–it’s not a hard and fast rule for the group!! This shows some good insight into crusty old marshmallows–I’ve had the pleasure of knowing 1 or 2 and this definitely relates to my experience. I really liked it! 🙂

30 03 2012
Kris Kennedy

Thanks for your comment. I don’t usually write “adult fiction” ad am thrilled to play/practice in it, that I let myself go, it was fun.

30 03 2012
Kris Kennedy

Thanks Jeannie…appreciate your input.

30 03 2012
Atiya

Awesome story, it was like re-living fear and love at the same time. It’s like being back when your parents were still a mystery not people like everyone else. Here is mine: http://remakingme-atiyatownes.blogspot.com/2012/03/flash-fiction-grand-dads-truck.html

30 03 2012
Kris Kennedy

I like how you said, remembering when “your parents were still a mystery, not people like everyone else…that would be a great line for a story…thanks for stopping by

30 03 2012
annewhitaker

Yes, I also wondered if this piece was fiction or not, for the same reason as Joe above. Very realistic. And I liked the dark, enigmatic undertow….

30 03 2012
Kris Kennedy

Wow, Anne, great to get your input…thanks. It is not a true story, I truly have just been dabbling with adult fiction. My writing experiences have been with picture books and early readers…so this has been so much fun.

30 03 2012
hannekekoop

I like this story.

30 03 2012
Kris Kennedy

Thanks for commenting…always appreciate your work.

30 03 2012
TheOthers1

This made me smile. Something about his reflecting really did it for me. Nice work!

My attempt: http://unduecreativity.wordpress.com/2012/03/28/state-pride/

30 03 2012
Kris Kennedy

Thanks for reading and I am glad you smiled. Thanks for the input.

30 03 2012
littlewonder2

Great opener, first of all. First line of the second paragraph, I stumbled on. Great description in the third. I love the whole characterisation of the story in general, and the last paragraph, ambiguous though it was, was an ass kicker.

30 03 2012
Kris Kennedy

Thanks for the detailed critique…I will take to heart and learn from…thanks

30 03 2012
R. N. Fontenot

He sounds tough and salty with quite the temper. I wonder if the child was also a part of those treasured possessions. Or if the tractor and his beat-up truck and who-knows-whatever-else were all he had room for. Don’t know why I thought he has a temper–the type that pounces out of nowhere. Probably because the child was so frightened and he didn’t even say a word. Great read!

Here’s mine: http://rnfontenot.wordpress.com/2012/03/30/flash-fiction-friday/

30 03 2012
Kris Kennedy

Thanks…wow, you really gave it some thought…thanks for reading.

30 03 2012
Print-Sense Photography & Design

Very nice Kris. It got me thinking about some of my own story ideas.

31 03 2012
Kris Kennedy

Wow! If it got you thinking about your own stories, great! Thanks so much for stopping by and reading…that means so much.

31 03 2012
dmmacilroy

Dear Kris,

The image of the old man leaning, puffing, and motioning with his head all are tucked neatly into my writer’s brain now, grist for the mill. I hope you recognize him should he ever show up in my work. A very nice story and well rendered.

Aloha,

Doug

31 03 2012
Kris Kennedy

Doug, I take that as such a compliment from you…I honor you as a writer…thanks for taking the time to read and comment.

31 03 2012
teschoenborn

That last line is absolutely wonderful!

Here’s mine: http://teschoenborn.com/2012/03/30/friday-fictioneer-4/

31 03 2012
Kris Kennedy

Wow, thanks…glad you liked it…

31 03 2012
irenelefort

He wasn’t such a grumpy old man afterall. The description is realistic. Well written. 🙂

31 03 2012
Kris Kennedy

Thanks Irene…glad you stopped by

1 04 2012
Lora Mitchell

Wow…your description of him was right on…with great details. Growing up, there were a few old men like him in the neighborhood, but they weren’t called old crusty marshmallows…but creepy, dirty old men. We ran away from them. A great read. Well done. Here’s mine:
http://www.triplemoonstar.blogspot.com

1 04 2012
Kris Kennedy

I know those people too…thanks for stopping by…

1 04 2012
Kris Kennedy

Hi Lora…I read yours and thought it was great…I really liked the honor and care that came forth…that story is a familiar one…sad, but true…very honoring.

6 04 2012
JoDee Luna

I love your photo. What a fantastic car and a touching story.

6 04 2012
Kris Kennedy

This is part of the Flash Friday Fictioneers…so much fun to write and create…you should check it out

6 04 2012
JoDee Luna

I will, and pass it on to my daughter, who is an aspiring novelist.

6 04 2012
Kris Kennedy

It certainly has been fun…great group of people.

6 04 2012
Flash Fiction Friday – Picture it and Write | Day in the life of a Busy Gal…

[…] Flash Friday Fictioneers (integrativethought.wordpress.com) […]

7 04 2012
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8 04 2012
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